Tuesday, January 13, 2009

Hoping Daddy will be a more effective helper soon

I'm thankful for having Jean-Louis here and appreciate all the help he is giving to Tristan and I so don't get me wrong here.  I understand that he was not brought up to take care of others really.  I guess his mom expected he would be fully taken care of by his future wife.  Sorry honey, you picked me and I'm not your typical stay-at-home mom.  In fact, I can't see myself only taking care of Tristan long term.  I love to cook but I don't like to clean and I expect everyone in the household to contribute to housework.  I always have.  As a young child growing up being ordered around to do chores while all the guys in the house got to sit around and watch TV, I threw many temper tantrums.  Tough luck Jean-Louis, you chose me!

So, if Jean-Louis is helping out, what is wrong then you're asking?  Well, he certainly helps out and since Tristan arrived, a lot of that help is voluntary too.  He just doesn't do things right all the time.  Okay, you're probably thinking he's a guy and that's totally normal!  When it comes to being able to console Tristan and calm him down and give mommy a much needed break, Jean-Louis seems to do the opposite.  In fact, putting Tristan down some times calms him more than holding him.  I demonstrated how to hold Tristan and how to talk to him and we even got Jean-Louis to wear one of my used breastfeeding shirts but nope.  Tristan could cry most of the day if I left him alone with Jean-Louis right now.  I sure hope this time passes and both Tristan and Jean-Louis learn to like each other more.

Jean-Louis must feel like crap too.  I sort of understand.  He doesn't know why Tristan doesn't like him.  Apparently, from talking with other fathers, it's quite normal for very young babies to be repelled by their father and to cry all the time.  Maybe in a month, things will be different.  I sure hope so because being with Tristan all day and then all night, I could certainly use a little break in the evenings.  Of course to be fair, in the evenings Tristan does cry more too.


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