Friday, April 17, 2009

Already tired of being a stay at home mom

It's the same old thing over and over again but now, Tristan is more difficult. I'm tired of the same old routine in the house and tired of seeing the same toys and playing. I'm frustrated I can't get more work done and these days, I have to hold Tristan in my lap with a toy if I want to work more. He freaks out when I'm out of sight, even when I appear soon after or if I continue to talk to him while I'm in another room. He wants to be held a lot more too. Argg! It has been almost 5 months and I'm going a little nuts these days. I went from fast-pace crazy busy and getting lots done to this slow-pace, boring routine, just watching the clock waiting for Daddy to get home. Am I alone here?

I need to get out more. When I go out, like when I went for a walk and coffee with a friend the other day, the day went zooming by. That was nice. It was nice to socialize in person with the outside world too. Ok, now I must sound like a freak. I need to invite over more visitors too on days I stay home. Tristan is easier to take out now so I really should take him out more. When I do go out, I don't get much work done though and right now, work is quite important. I know, I'm a bit complicated :)

After the iPhone app is released and the website is done, I have to seriously look into daycare and babysitting for Tristan. I need a break from him so I can do other things like work and exercise. I think we both need to get away from each other :)

We have weekend plans that involve going out! This weekend and the next :) One day will be dedicated to working and chores and the other will be a fun day. If only weekends were longer.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Hi, I'm a new mom who is moving to Vancouver in September with my hubby and 8month old son. I came across your blog while looking for mommygroups and ways to connect with other moms and women. Do you have any advice on where I should look or sites to join? Thanks
candiceriopel@shaw.ca

Susan said...

Hi. You're going to love it in Vancouver!

I'm in the Burnaby area and groups closest to my area is the Bonsor Parent and Infant Group (6550 Bonsor Avenue) and Eileen Dailly parent and Infant Group (240 Willingdon Avenue). Those were the 2 that our visiting nurse gave us.

If you are on Twitter, search for keywords such as Vancouver mommy or Vancouver mom and you may find upcoming events for moms you would not otherwise know about. For examples, I noticed there was a mom meetup in Kits this past weekend from http://www.yummymummyclub.ca .

Best of Luck!

Maria Cristina said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Anonymous said...

Susan, I am shocked reading your latest blog. We have something in common - being a new mom. I have almost a 6 month old son. Blogs are a great place to share and I appreciate your honesty. However, and I say this caringly, maybe it is worth considering what your priorties are right now. Work and creating an iphone app may seem important, but when you chose to become a mom, that should have became your real first priority (is that judgemental?) It seems like your struggling and not enjoying yourself as a mom. It could be better for you. It could be the happiest time of your life. Children are the most vulnerable members of our society and need love and caring all of the time.
I gave up a long time ago trying to type, update emails and a website(I also work p/t from home) and it has made a huge difference. Be present for your baby. Do those work things when your baby is sleeping. Your son needs and wants you. I suggest you look into the theory of attachment and you may understand why it is your son is crying when you leave the room,and wants to be held so much. Resources: talk with your public health nurses about the cuddle program. There are also groups in the lower mainland that offer courses on balancing parenthood, and work etc, and it might be very useful for you to look into these to help you cope. Check out: http://www.mamarenew.ca/ I came across it a few days ago. Also check out meetup.com and join the burnaby moms group, we do lots of fun things and is a great way to get support and meet moms in the area. I hope to meet you out of the house with your son one day. Happy times! I will check for any reply.

Susan said...

This is a reply to the last comment.

I was a bit confused about this comment since this post was written back in April and you mentioned that you just read my latest blog post. The latest post at the time of this comment was actually to wish everyone a happy new year http://mommying-around.blogspot.com/2009/12/happy-new-year-2010-happy-new-decade.html.

A lot of things have changed since April. If you read enough of the later posts, you will see. Knowing that our baby was finally going to daycare soon, last month I didn't do much work at all and focused on spending a lot of time playing with him. You are right, when I don't try to do too much and give myself permission to be fully present, I enjoy being a stay-at-home mom a lot more :)

Working while the baby was sleeping was doable at one point when he would sleep 1 maybe 2 hours straight but now, he has 2 cat naps a day of just 20 minutes. It's useless so I don't even try to do much. If I can go to the bathroom during that time, then I have accomplished something!

In terms of attached parenting, I respect your opinion but I see some of those things a bit differently. We may have other disagreements too but that is okay. I don't expect everyone to parent like us. It may not seem like that to you after reading a few posts, but my baby has always been my first priority. I'm a bit sad you don't think so.

You're right, I probably should have gone out more and seeked out groups but I felt uncomfortable doing so. It definitely would have made my days more pleasurable if only I could have made myself do it. The time has passed now and things are quite different these days. Thanks for all the links and advice and I appreciate you taking the time to comment on my blog post. Best regards.

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